The Progressive Masculinity Program:
Pupil Workshops
Aims:
- To challenge regressive power and dominance based models of masculinity.
- To explore how qualities like empathy, cooperation, compassion and respect can features of a ‘strong’ man
- To raise the self-esteem, emotional intelligence and oracy of the pupils involved, encouraging aspirational goals.
- To tap into our pupils’ leadership potential, empowering them to be the drivers for positive change within the school.
Impact Data:
Measured four weeks leading up to the program (black) and four weeks following the program (blue).
Workshop Program Overview:
We offer each school the choice of eight workshops from which they choose the six they feel would have the greatest impact. This gives each school the freedom to construct a bespoke Progressive Masculinity Workshop Program.
- What is masculinity? Who am I ‘meant’ to be?
Most boys don’t have a life. What they have is an act. When a man is deeply unhappy, desperately worried, utterly alone or confused he will often pretend the opposite, and so no one will know. Early in life little boys are taught to pretend. Most will do this for the rest of their life. (Wilson 2013)
This first session will explore some of the damaging stereotypes of masculinity by identifying negative influences and pressures of the unwritten ‘Man Code’ by which many of our male pupils live. A safe, nonjudgemental space is created in order for the young men to feel like they can be honest and speak their minds . Central to this workshop is the question: What does being a man mean? Intersections such as LGBTQ, race, sexuality and disability are explored in relation to views on masculinity. .
2. Hierarchy, Friendship and Banter
Not knowing the inner world of real men, each boy is forced to base his idea on a thinly drawn image, gleaned from television, cinema and his peers, which he then acts out, hoping to prove he is a man. (Biddulph 2004)
This session will focus on how boys and men interact with each other. Why we structure ourselves into a hierarchy and how we establish our places within that hierarchy. Key to this session are the questions: how can we keep the best aspects of male friendships, banter and culture while having the strength to avoid the pitfalls and dangers? Do I have the strength to maintain my values and sense of responsibility when part of a group?
3. Communication and Emotional Literacy
If he can’t communicate, he can’t negotiate. If he can’t negotiate, then he can’t ask for what he wants. If he can’t get what he wants, he just grabs it. (Wilson 2013)
It is shown that girls use between 10 and 30 times more words in their primary school play. This language is mostly cooperative as opposed to the limited language used by boys which is mostly competitive. (Wilson 2013)
Suicide is the number one killer of 18 to 45 year old men in the UK. The reasons? They don’t know how to ask for help or are too ashamed to ask for it. (Man Up 2018)
This session will focus on how we communicate with those around us and whether our methods of verbal and non-verbal communication lead to positive or negative outcomes. By the end of the session the boys will have developed an understanding of the importance of communication and how communication can result in progress and cooperation rather than conflict. They will also be aware of the dangers of not communicating and the support available to them.
4. Emotional Control and Self Regulation
If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs
…then you’ll be a man my son (Rudyard Kipling)
This session will focus on recognising triggers for our anger and developing strategies to help us maintain a sense of control and encourage self-regulation. Biological and psychological factors will be discussed and role play will enable us to explore real life, high frequency situations where emotional control is needed. By the end of the session the pupils will have developed an understanding of some of the underlying reasons for their anger, the dangers of not controlling it and ‘coping and de-escalation’ techniques for when they find themselves struggling to maintain control.
5. Masculinity in the Digital World
“The internet mirrors, magnifies and makes more visible, the good, the bad and the ugly of everyday life.” (Danah Boyd)
This session will focus on how our understanding of masculinity is impacted by the digital world. What kind of men are celebrated and promoted within the online world? How does ‘influencer culture’ impact the way we see masculinity? Do we uphold the key values from our offline life when we are online? Does the anonymity and lack of accountability which comes with the online world change the way we act? Do we have the strength to be true to our values in the online world?
6. Attitudes towards women
“Feminism is the radical notion that women are people” (Marie Shear)
This session will focus on the effects our interpretations of masculinity have on those around us. What social pressures and expectations are unfairly placed on females? How can we help break these pressures and become allies for females by supporting them to be whatever they want to be? How can we become upstanders when we see sexism and misogyny in everyday life? This session was created in collaboration with many girls and women in order to make sure the female voice and perspective was represented.
7. Healthy Relationships and Consent
“Treasure your relationships not your possessions” (Anthony D’Angelo)
This workshop focusses on the apsects of a healthy relationship, such as mutual respect, trust, honesty, compromise and communication. As part of this we explore the importance of boundaries within consent: establishing boundaries which make us feel comfortable, communicating these boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others.
8. Who Do You Want To Be?
“Every man is the architect of his own fortune” (Appius)
This uplifting and motivational final session focusses on the kind of men, partners and fathers we aspire to be in the future. Are we on course to becoming these men? If not, what changes and adjustments can we make in order to become the kind of man we would be proud of? Examples of men who embrace an open-minded and progressive masculinity are discussed and celebrated to highlight how we can be both strong AND compassionate, successful AND selfless.
Post Program Support
Upon the conclusion of the pupil workshops schools will be given ideas, materials and resources to help them continue the work which has been started. These include:
- Templates for pupil-created PSHCE lessons, allowing our young men to take ownership and broadcast their positive messages of masculinity, raising whole-school awareness of the issues facing them. Schools have found this to produce very engaging dialogue and debates within PSHCE lessons (amongst female pupils as well as male).
- The framework and resources for a peer support program where older pupils take on a role of responsibility, being coached to support younger pupils struggling to understand the same issues the workshop focussed on. Data tracking has shown this to be a very effective program for both parties.